My Miscellany: To Follow Or Not To Follow?


According to WordPress I have 360 “followers.”  Truly?  I wish!  I average about 15-25 “likes” per post.  Where the heck are the other 340?  Lol.  But, not my actual point.  This got me thinking about who I follow, and why.

What I have learned is that I have been ignoring some folks that have been showing me consistent and solid support, and I have been “following” and investing serious time and effort in some folks for quite some time that have shown me scant support.lovemybloggers on justruminating men's blog

Well, today I cleared house and started following you folks I have missed.  I guess that’s just the ebb and flow of blogging.  Because I don’t believe in “following” everyone, I have been devoted to pretty much the same 30 or so poets since I joined here in mid-October.


That number has pretty much allowed me–very nearly most of the time–to post quality comments on posts.  For me, following any more would not allow me to give consistent, quality feedback.

What I am concerned about is making sure that the folks I am supporting are the folks who are regularly and consistently supporting me.  That’s reciprocity!  Makes sense right?  Or at least I hope it does!

Before I decided to launch some folks, I got very anal about this and counted each person who has “liked” each of my last 25 poems.  I discovered the same core group of bloggers, so that’s who I am following today.

reciprocityfunny on justruminating men's blog

So, thank you very much to you who have shown me such love and support.  And thank you for those of you who occasionally stop in and “like” or comment, I am most grateful.  I understand everyone can’t visit everyday and then I’d have to follow 360 followers, lol.  I just can’t follow everyone and be fair to your work.

At least you all know now why I am or am not following you.  And, to the new folks I am now following, I promise to show you the same love and support you have shown me.  Sorry I’m a bit late to the party.


  • Good for you Rob, to clean house!!

  • This ebb and flow surrounding followers can be maddening at times. One becomes focused on stats, and it can influence writing at times. I’ll give you examples. On another blog I had, I got over 3100 views in one day for a flippant meme I posted with a witty caption. At the same time, a three part short story I wrote received 120 views for all three parts combined over a week. Beyond that, a fairly lengthy post I wrote about ending a friendship has been viewed over 10,000 times. You just never know what people will focus on. To be fair, I have over 2000 posts on that blog and most of them got around 30 views.

    Even writing this comment is exhausting. 🙂 The point is, we are all niche markets, so just post yourself and people will come. The interactions are often more important. The atmosphere to your blog menu, if you will.

    • Thank you for your thoughtful response. It always about quality for me. My post was simply about reciprocity, not how many like a or views I’m getting, but I get what you’re saying for sure!

      • Quality is important, but there can be a subtle influence as you see what plays well and what doesn’t.

      • Again I post what I want when I want how I want. My post was about following and the logic behind it. If you read some of my posts you’ll see, I write from the same place every time, no holds barred…ever

      • Absolutely! I missed this before, possibly due to lack of coffee. Reciprocity is a compliment, for sure, to those who appreciate your style and let you know they do. I will definitely read more of you.

      • Oops. Hit send too early, lol.
        Interactions are the most important, and it starts with each post, definitely. Variety simply means you will interact with different segments of readers. It’s all interesting. Quality makes for a deeper conversation.

  • Valid points! 🙂

  • Cool beans dude!

  • Keep doing what you love, that’s what its all about.

  • You have 360 followers and you only joined in October?! That’s super impressive.
    I, for one, am very glad you’re here. Thanks for being awesome. 🙂

  • Well, I support you whether I read/like everything or not. For sure I don’t read poetry much. I realized I am NOT a poet and I don’t really get poetry. I guess that’s not in my gift package 🙂 – But like I said, I support you. And one day you’ll have my camera- so how’s that for reciprocation. LOL. xo

  • Good post, and I wish more WP users would make known their follow philosophies. Why follow someone if you’re never going to read their posts? Seriously, some people will just follow without even reading one post. To them I say good riddance and block them. Harsh, but I’m sure they haven’t even noticed my absence in their Reader feed. Ha, but I’m here like you and your loyal readers: to build community and support one another not only in our writing endeavors but in life’s ups and downs as well. Peace Rob!

    • Yes, I have noticed your absence. And yes, that is my purpose here as well. I hope all is ok. Your writings are always profound and thought provoking. Thank you for you!

      • My absence? You are certainly not one of the blogs I’ve blocked. I was being cheeky in that I suspect those business-oriented blogs that follow with no intention of reading but as a passive way to advertise, will click ‘follow’ on 100 blogs a day and so will never notice that I blocked them. Thanks for the kudos, and yes, I may not publish that often, but I have a new series that I’ll kick off tomorrow. Music-based, you might enjoy it. Oh, and I think it is awesome that you have such a loving and supportive audience. It should never be about the numbers.

      • Thank you. I just thought you haven’t been around because I haven’t seen a lot of posts. I’m just hoping this post came across as intended and not as a negative thing. I look forward to your series

  • I try to read as much as I can. And leave my thoughts . That has created a bond which is wonderful. It’s like everyone is talking to each other. And speaking they’re heart without inhibitions. I doubt we actually do that in real life. There is no judge ment here. All here to say our bit.

    • Yes Yasmine! And you, my dear, other than two other bloggers, have shown me much love and support from the beginning. I am so grateful that you are in my life!

  • Nice! 😃 I’ve been blogging for 2 years and I’ve done basically the same thing, follow the people who really engage with me (plus some blogs that I’m truly just interested in the content and couldn’t care less about the feedback part). Glad to have connected, Rob.

    • Right? It only took me 4 months to figure that out, duh!

      • The ‘likers’ who never comment baffle me. I have some people who like everything but never say a word!

      • Baffles me I’m nearing 400 followers and I’ve only cracked 30 likes on a post 3 or four times. A little confidence buster at times for what I’m putting out here you know?

      • Hmmmm…. I’d have to look at my stats but I don’t think that’s bad at all. 💙

      • lol. I just wonder what the other 340 people are doing everyday. Doesn’t matter, it’s not at all going to change a damn thing about how I blog. Although, I would love to have a rapturous audience, I write for me!

      • Keep composing and soon you’ll have a volume of poetry to publish!

      • That is my dream someday. I don’t have access to my computer in storage, but on it is my earlier poetry from 1987-2000. I then stopped writing mostly, with maybe a spattering of poems until I started this blog. So I maybe have 200 or so total poems. Almost all of my earlier work is rhyming poetry. I used to have such a disdain for Free Verse, but I write it all the time now. Thus is my evolution!

      • I’m the same! I never could write a poem that didn’t rhyme… didn’t feel like it was really poetry. But now I really love it! It’s just about using beautiful language and finding a rhythm. You have more than enough for a volume of poetry. Hope you can get them collected some day!

      • Thanks for sharing Meg. Youre one of the folks I should have been following with your support. I’m glad you spend the time as I will spend the time as well

      • I look forward to it!

  • Haha I was wondering about that. And honestly, I didn’t get on here for followers. I feel the same as Natalie, I didn’t expect anyone to read it. Every read is still a lovely surprise to me. I don’t really have any expectations. And I don’t want to be “followed” either, by anyone who feels obligated. Time is clearly a factor, and I agree, it’s nice to have it somewhat manageable for meaningful exchanges, if that’s really possible lol. This is a lovely post about a side effect of WP I didn’t anticipate! 🙂

    • Well, I just realized it today, and you have been there for me and I have not for you. But I have corrected this egregious error lol.

      • Honestly, Rob, I’ve never thought of you like that, I mean I never thought you weren’t there for me. How funny.

      • Well that means a lot because I have always been here for you. I just should have been supporting you and your work directly rather than those who would always respond to my feedback, but who never gave me any. Problem solved

  • I have had a few blogs over the years and I remember initially when I first created one I never had imagined that it was going to be read. I know I know, laugh out loud about that. But I genuinely never imagined that in a million years someone would be interested in a damn thing that I had to say let alone repeat read anything else I ever did after they accidentally stumbled upon something I wrote.
    Several years have past and several stances on blogging, reading, commenting and appreciation have past as well. These days I’m more relaxed with what occurs for me. I try not to feel too guilty, too obligated or too expecting. All that you say here makes perfect sense.
    Being attentive to people you follow is the kindest and most sought after way of showing appreciation for someone. Nice post.

    • First, I’m grateful to you for your kind comments. Second, I am hoping I came across just as you said you are: not making folks feel obligated or expecting everyone to read me, that would suck lol. And finally, I appreciate your visit

  • I try to watch my “likes” closely. I try to follow all the bloggers who regularly read and visit. It’s hard to find time to read everything I WANT to read…

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