Tag Archives: advice

Living Life Well: Having Humor

living_life_well_on_recoverywise

Gems for living a life of wellness. Lessons I have learned, or am learning, during this crazy journey through life.

As we struggle through this life–and it can be a struggle–we need to keep a sense of proportion about it.  What we do and what we take seriously can often be so far removed from what it is actually all about that it is laughable.

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So today, we want to try to the best we can and have a sense of humor.  We get bogged down in trivia, lost in irrelevant detail to such an extent that our life can whizz past and we don’t even notice.  By letting go of things that really aren’t important, we can put ourselves back on the right track.

And the best way to do that is through humor–laughing at ourselves, laughing at our situation, but never laughing at others–although it’s hard some days lol–they’re just as lost as us.

Life is for living, enjoying the sunshine, big things–not getting in a terrible mood because you dropped some eggs on the supermarket floor, someone didn’t hold the door open as you were approaching.

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Laughing at yourself and situations you find yourself in has a double positive effect.  First, it diffuses tension and helps regain a sense of proportion; and second, it has real physical as well as mental benefits.  Laughter causes the release of endorphins, which make you feel better and give you a better perspective on life.

If you observe any aspect of human behavior, you can see the ridiculousness in all of it.  Learn to find the funny side of everything.  It’s the best technique for instant stress relief and dissolves anxiety and doubt.  Try it!

Spirituality: One Heart

Spread The Love
One Heart presented by Robert Levasseur

Recovery: 55 Months Sober

55 Months Clean!
My belongings Robert Levasseur
Few Belongings

Today I celebrate 55 months clean and sober from alcohol and drugs. Double nickels. Twin 5’s. I look at my life now and am filled with gratitude at what I have. A loving wife. A beautiful 10-month old daughter who is the light of my world. I just published my first Poetry Anthology. There’s my beautiful home. Money in the bank.

I have lots of furnishings and belongings that I didn’t have on May 12th, 2016, the day I entered jail. Suffice it to say, I’ve spent a lot of money over the last 2 years amassing comforts of home and surrounding myself with antique books, and a respectable Stephen King collection.

When I left jail the sum of my belongings equaled about 4 medium sized U-Haul boxes. Mostly clothes really. I remember being pissed off at the time that all of my other things were taken away by my alcoholism. I missed a lot of days of work, so I would have to sell my beautiful watches. Collections of baseball cards. Jewelry. I fought with myself to get over being so mad for weeks. I finally did so.

It’s Only Stuff

Even after being on my own from November of 2017, until my wife arrived in-country in January of 2019, I amassed very little. Saving money was not something I was good at. My apartment was very modest. Most of it filled with donations from Veterans programs. There wasn’t even a t.v. until mid-2019. When my wife arrived I had very little to offer her. But, I don’t want to get ahead of MY STORY, since I am still writing it.

My library
Some of My Books

You are going to find this amusing: sometimes I get depressed thinking about how, when I die, I won’t be able to take my beloved belongings with me. Will my wife and daughter keep my library? What’s going to happen to my trinkets? I’ve actually made a list of the most important books I want them to keep in the family.

Books might one day become obsolete, so I want the written word in my family for as long as possible. Maybe it has everything to do with being afraid of being alone in death; without the comforts I have been able to surround myself with over the last few years. Maybe it’s the worry of being erased off the earth and someone else has my shit. Yeah, I don’t know why that is, exactly.

Acceptance

But being 55 months clean and sober isn’t just about reclaiming a stake in the world of possessions. Hell no. I have transformed my way of thinking. My way of doing things. The choices I make about how I want to be, act, feel. One of the most important components of my recovery is ACCEPTANCE. It’s one of my 5 Pillars of Recovery.

I no longer live each day pissing and moaning about all the small perceived injustices in life. News is not a part of my daily life. Everything is not a personal affront. I do not get caught up hassling with the minutiae of life. Acceptance has been the key to my success; of course in addition to my other pillars. But acceptance is at the heart of my recovery. The Serenity Prayer is at the core of my existence. I no longer have an attitude problem with people I perceive as inferior. I do not judge people anymore.

As a result of practicing acceptance, I am so much more at peace with myself and life. I no longer try to force life to bend to my will. That futility was fueled for years by my addiction. My addiction helped me to build giant walls within myself. Arrogance and abrasiveness ruled the day. It was how I kept people at bay.

My Recovery
SnaGm by Robert Levasseur
My 5 Pillars

Recovery is my greatest possession. Without it I would most certainly be dead or in jail. I am very proud of the fact that I have enjoyed 55 months of sobriety without relapse. I don’t buy into triggers because I keep the golden rule of my recovery always as the first line of defense: DO NOT PICK UP.

As long as I do not pick up, I know I can stay the course. But that just means I am sober. Living in true recovery means living a better way than I did before. It means coming to terms with the past. Letting go.

It means I don’t ruminate on the future while I waste away my present. The way I view the world and myself in it has changed drastically. I changed the habits I had formed from years of abusing drugs and alcohol. I changed the way I think, period.

Change For The Better

And you know what? Change is good! No longer do I live discontented. I am much more content and satisfied with my existence because I am no longer avoiding reality. Daily engagement of self-destruction has ended. Chaos no longer reigns supreme in my life. I accept life on life’s terms. It’s so much less exhausting than the way I was living before; always trying to control every variable within and without myself.

Without getting all caught up in other people’s way of being, in the experiences I was having–good or bad–and by simply living in the now and being present has made all the difference in the world. Many of my long-time readers know the level of importance I give to living in the present. Carpe Diem! It simplifies things when my mind wants to wander back into the misery of the past, or the unknown of the future. It allows me to be firmly grounded in the only time that I have: NOW!

To The Future Then

Today I am grateful for 55 months. Today I am content with my life. No, my life is not perfect, but it’s pretty damn close. By focusing on what’s before me I am able to keep a razor-sharp focus on gratitude and acceptance. I am able to take on what I need to take on without being overwhelmed or setting myself up for failure.

Carpe Diem!

Staying in my own lane is a high priority for me now. I focus on my side of the fence. I try not to get caught up in social media. Not the news. Not the madness of the minions. Just my little world. With my beautiful wife and baby. I have a strength of resolve that is stronger than it ever was for any time in my life.

And you know what? It’s sustained. It is sustaining. I don’t have time to look for monsters under the bed. I o longer allow my childhood trauma to define me. Today is what defines me as a man; not the past.

And when my mind wants to play games with me and try to lead me into wonders of ruination and things said and done, I firmly fix my being in the present and simply accept with gratitude the new life I’ve been able to build because of my recovery.

Living Life Well: Make Your Bed

living_life_well_on_recoverywise

Gems for living a life of wellness. Lessons I have learned, or am learning, during this crazy journey through life.

Every action you take, every decision you make, everything you do causes an immediate effect on those around you–and on you.  And this is the important bit.  There is such a thing as instant karma.  It is your bed, and you are going to have to lie in it.  Therefore:  Choose How You Make Your Bed!

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Your actions will dictate whether in general your life is going to run happily or badly, smoothly or as if the wheels have fallen off.  If you are selfish and manipulative, it will rebound on you.  If you are generally loving and thoughtful, you will get your just rewards–and not in heaven (or the next life or whatever you believe) but right here, right now.

Trust me.  Whatever you do and how you do it will come back to you in spades.  This isn’t a threat for living.  It’s an observation.  It’s happened to me time and time again.  Those who do good, get good.  Those who do bad, get bad.

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I know we can all point to people who seem to have it made and are still pretty vile.  But, trust me, they don’t sleep well at night, if at all.  They have no one to really love them.

Inside they are sad and lonely and frightened.  Those who go around sharing a bit of love and kindness get rewarded with the same coming back.

So be careful how you make your bed.  What goes around, comes around.  There is instant karma.  What you sow you reap.  Better to stand up and be counted right from the start.  Do the right thing, every time.  You know what it is.  Then when you get in the bed you’ve made, not only will you be able to sleep at night, but you’ll sleep the sleep of the just.

bed3

Spirituality: Beyond

Life Beyond Your Mind
Beyond by Robert M. Levasseur
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