Comments And Community

Feedback and Community
Read Part I: Why Blog Comments Matter

I just wanted to say that I appreciated the thoughtful comments I received on Part I. Especially those from Silverapplequeen, Cindy over at Unique Times, my long-time subscriber Ronnie, and the young lady (who has an amazing blog or two for such a young writer) over at Introverted Thoughts.

Comments and Community

In Why Blog Comments Matter, I was supposed to tell you why, but I kinda never did! Instead, I spiraled off into discussing comment statistics and bashing the WordPress Reader. So today I am going to dive right into how feedback (comments) help to build a vibrant community between our blogs, as I only briefly did in my post from 4 years ago! Which is another way of showing you why blog comments matter.

There are many ways in which comments can affect the author. And, depending on the comment thread, can really have a great affect on the community surrounding the author. Here are some of the ways that comments can affect not only the author, but the communities that author is connected to:

Comments Results In
show appreciationmy work is worthwhile
impart empathy people were touched
supply positive reinforcementI should keep going
provide encouragementI am uplifted
illustrate understandingpeople are getting it
encourage meaningful dialoguepeople are joining in
strengthen community tiesI feel connected
provide words of affirmationmy work is meaningful
Why Blog Comments Matter – In A Nutshell

As an aside, there is a great book called The 5 Love Languages, by Gary Chapman. The author basically illustrates that most of us respond to any one of five love languages. That our relationships would all be that much better if we figure out our significant others’ Love Language. Commenting certainly has to do with one of them: Words of Affirmation.

Comments and Community
The 5 Love Languages

People with words of affirmation as a love language value verbal acknowledgments of affection, including frequent “I love you’s,” compliments, words of appreciation, verbal encouragement, and often frequent digital communication like texting and social media engagement. “Written and spoken shows of affection matter the most to these people,” says couples’ psychotherapist Fariha Mahmud-Syed, MFT, CFLE. “These expressions make them feel understood and appreciated.”

Perhaps Words of Affirmation is not your particular language, but I think most of us would agree that using Words of Affirmation in our comments, will most certainly have a positive effect on that blogger; considering that the other 4 Love Languages are not really viable options in the blogosphere, we’ve got nothing to lose and everything to gain in supplying them! For me it’s also just an act of kindness to lift a blogger up who has few to no comments on a post that is particularly worthwhile. The reward is in the deed itself.

So When Should We Comment Then?

That’s up to you. Since it is both impractical and unnecessary to comment on every blog post we read, when should we comment then? These are the times that I will more often than not post a comment: Each one links to an actual post I commented on.

  • When someone has deeply affected me
    Ever lost a friend?
    This is a poem I wrote while thinking about some of the friendships I made in my life, which as years went by, simply faded away. Perhaps something went wrong, or we simply grew our own separate wa…
  • When someone has worked hard on a post
    The Unruh Effect
    Every Time You Accelerate, You Create An Event Horizon To begin with, that just slows down their approach speed. Then that constant acceleration brings them to a halt, and further, they start movin…
  • When someone has shared something deep and personal
    The winding road of therapy.
    As I was looking through my posts of last October I saw that it was then when I decided to write my experiences with therapy down. I did that for quite a while and I’ll link the other parts of my ...
  • When someone has shared something I am passionate about
    Musings
    There is so much strength in surrender to the moment.  Whenever we accept our current circumstances, we can spot clues and directions with a calmer eye.  They may not detail a straight-line path ...
  • When someone has taught me something
    Passwords: Part 4
    You can check if you have had a security breach with an email account, by going to haveibeenpwned.com and inserting your email address. You may have had a security breach even though you have been …
  • When someone has taken the time to comment on one of my posts
    Just Sayin':  Why Blog Comments Matter - RecoveryWise
    Bloggers will tell you why blog comments matter! Comments help bloggers know if they are writing content that matters. Post those comments!
  • When I want to chime in my two cents
    Saturday Caturday
    I knew as soon as I took the large screen off of the front door & put up the heavy storm window, it would get warm again! I propped open the door with a box of books to let in the warm southerl…
  • When I see a post with 30 or more likes and few to no comments
    Leavittation
    how to climb off-widths in Poland!
  • When the folks I follow post something (whenever possible)
    With Cycling, the Toys are Fun, the Fitness is Great, but What Really Make the Pedals Go ‘Round ...
    My friend, Chuck, was excited. He was all set to ride his 25th century (100 miles, not kms) for 2020 yesterday. The weather was going to be perfect, too. Sunny, 65 at the start, 75 at the finish (1…

What does your list look like?

A Simple Comment Structure

Framing a comment doesn’t have to be difficult to be impactful. Here’s how I try to frame each of my comments whenever possible:

a. Expression of gratitude: “I really enjoyed what you had to say about…”

b. (optional) Empathetic Statement: I could identify with you subject matter because…”

c. Compliment: “This post was very well written. I particularly liked…”

d. Gratitude: “Thank you for taking the time to share such a great story.”

Or something along those lines. It doesn’t have to be a novel. It doesn’t have to be some great work of art. It just has to be genuine with the aim at making the author feel appreciated and heard.

Now go out and build your community! PS: Linking to other blogs within certain posts is a terrific way to encourage others to do the same! Even if they do not, it’s a great way to build interconnections between blogs, and to introduce to your community, blogs they may be unaware of but should be!

7 comments

  • It has been a bit since I’ve been on this particular WP login and you are absolutely right. I enjoy reading people’s thoughts and comments, I like to follow different blogs, and often blog authors are some of my very favorite people!
    One of the blogs I follow asks 3 questions at the close of his writing, which didn’t exactly work on my other blog. So, I just write and hope someone is blessed or laughs or something!! I’ll definitely remember these tips on how to reply to something. Likes are nice, but WHY does someone like what they read????? This intrigues me and I’m sure it intrigues others.

  • WOW! Thank you for the mention!! I really appreciate it! Hugs!

  • Wow, thank you so much for that kind mention!
    Like part 1, this too was quite informative and insightful, especially that nutshell you shared. I’ve never given much thought to the science of commenting or the type of language. This was also a very useful post because I’m often unsure on how to frame a comment. Thank you for sharing!!

  • Awww, first off, thanks Rob for such a kind shout out that you gave me. I am happy to know you are grateful for our exchange and honor of time and words that we mutually share.
    This is a great post reminding us that what we put in comes back and to be mindful of how powerful words are and make a difference in people’s lives. Likes and comment are a 2 way exchange which is important to remember as well as how much you post in my estimation. Ok sorry, I’m getting long winded ( I will no doubt write on this too at some point). oh sorry and one more thing, if you only get one response or like a day from me if you post a lot in a day, it’s because it’s because life is full!!!!
    LOVE your charts and the 5 Languages Of Love is an AWESOME book. Thanks for a GREAT post.
    👏👏👏👏👏♥️ Cindy

I'd Love To Hear Your Comments!